Making Friends

A few days ago, I was asked by an international student a simple question, but it took some time to think about it. She asked “How can I make American friends?” It was a simple question, but I had to think about my experience of how I made friends in college. I met those that when I approach them, they kindly talked to me and we were friends that quickly. Then I met those who I would wave my hand saying hello and going to talk to them, they look at me like I am some odd stranger and those rejections hurt. After much thinking, I’ve concluded that making friend is a process. First, I must start with priming and that means I need a good starter. The best one is a smile. I smile at them and watch for a smile back. If so, I proceed, with a “Hello, how are you?” conversation and watch for a response. Then, I want to do what I call scanning/ researching. In this phase, I would ask those questions about their classes or perhaps something that I know would be of interest to them and I would make a friend from there.

-Priscilla Her